I dun blame you dun understand how i am thinking now.. i dun wish to give more explanation... now my temper is on exploding mood.. anytime will just trigger off.. Yes i might be over protective to nerd nerd.. but as i have said le.. she is my 10 plus years good frenz .. she stand a big place in my heart.. apart from I cannot and dun wish to take off dad off my mind.. i have to think my home matters.. that money problem i guess i cannot just let it go loose anything might just go wrong.. and my sis and auntie.. all about money and only one me.. i have to solve.. when there is problem.. no one want to come up to burden.. i have to clear all.. and now.. I am afraid ah kor will continue to depress from it.. i really wish he can stand up soon.. even the ending is not a good one.. i hope we still frenz and his life will be back to normal soon.. i hope to see his smile again.. I am tired.. what i wish is a bf to understand me and maybe to support me and not critize on the matters.. and end up i have to console another person.. i guess a quiet moment for me will be great..

One thing i found out and realise.. thing done is done there is no way to undo or treat as nothing happen.. there is no way to erase it off ... i have done the hurt to him and so it is always be there no matter what.. no matter even it had pass a few months.. this bother me as when it time to quarrel things will resurface it is a no way return thing.. maybe i should do something too...